Emptiness, unmotivated, undecisive, Itchiness

I have been haunted by the feeling of emptiness ever since CNY is over for me and the fact that semester will be starting early next month and i will have to go to Melbourne again at the end of this month.

There's are lot's of things that i wanted to do before i headed to Melbourne yet am so unmotivated to do it. This holiday have been very very long and i do feel the need of some purpose in my life. I feel the need to do something more meaningful other than hanging out with the beloved computer and internet. I wonder how blunt my brain has become over these 4 months of holidays.

I have been having a big dillema trying to enter my preference for the semester 1 timetable. With so much uncertain on which tutorial classed that i might get it's really hard to key in those preference. I don't really want to get too many free time in between classes cos that will mean i will have to go to the campus everyday and wasted heaps of time on waiting for the time for next classes. I know i can always use those in between time for some study but i always find it more efficient to study at home when i don't have any time limit and free to study in my own pace till the whole thing is done, don't really like to do stuff half way and to be continue. If possible i would like to get it done in one go. This kinda have sth to do with my personality i guess. I find it kinda hard to get my 100% performance out when am not very motivated to get the stuff done untill the situation call for it, ie during exam or assignment is due in X hrs, the feeling of gonna die soon will certainly drive some motivation from me. Undecisive with how my preferene order should be~~~



Another things that have been bothering me is the sudden apperance of rashes on both my hand out of the blue. It's been there since sunday night and i don't recall eating or touching anything doggy that might set it on. Luckily it's not ithcy 24/7 but from time to time i do feel the itchiness and i always tend to scratch it. Probably gonna go consult a doctor if it doesn't get any better tomorrow, been trying to wash the hand with Dettol and apply some cream for allergic skin.